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will ([personal profile] royalist) wrote in [community profile] euchronia2024-11-01 10:37 am
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001 » i can't help but find myself






fanart by [twitter.com profile] 8koenji.
for louis at luciferi.


luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto vi)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-13 07:22 pm (UTC)(link)
[ he says, possibly all too casually: ]

The hatred sowed by the church runs deep, and the elda have not been proactive in refuting the church's hellish rumors upon them. You and I bear the brunt of those decisions made over the last thousand years, and the differences between the tribes are easily exploited for power.

[ along with Hythlodaeus' and Forden's, but Louis always found them indicative of a deeper, more systemic problem. while the elda were not deserving of what happened to them, far, far from it, but locking themselves away along with the hidden history of the world did nothing but cause a greater downfall. there's some satisfaction in knowing the sanctum is returning to the ruins as it should, as if walking away from the past. Louis' resurrection means that Will, at least, was thinking more pragmatically about the future than his father ever did.

before he knows it, Will has already wiggled between him and the rail, and is offering a soft contact that he'd forgotten about in his madness. soft hair, and a soft expression from the young king as they gaze across the ruins of their former home.

Louis sighs, a momentary break in the thoughts of politics and consequences, as Wil leans into him. he did miss him, didn't he? its still rather unfathomable to him, though he supposes it's one of the reasons he so desperately wanted Will to join him.

Louis Charadrius doesn't sound bad, does it?
]

No one had ever asked of my birthright, only assumed. The differences, perhaps, so miniscule that a little glamour and no one cared to notice.

[ dark lashes fall over his eyes, half-lidded and softer. the warmth in his voice that had been gone so long seems to creep back into the edges. he confirms for Will, because he may as well hear it. while Louis may trap, ensnare, and use omission to fuel his own plots, he does not outright lie. ]

I will not turn these spineless fools to humans, if that's what you're asking of me. They don't deserve as much.

[ they will be reminded of the scum that they are, before either dying in the old world, or becoming part of the new one. ]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xxix)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-16 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
[ it was that fated day when More handed him a copy of that book with precious words about utopia, that Louis would no longer be the same. for a while he looked up to the elder clemar that had come to the eldan sanctum, eagerly asking questions about the world outside the forest.

why – why did the elda lock themselves away? why did they allow the world to shroud itself in lies as they alone sat upon the truth? when More left, the church came with their warrior monks in the name of a cruel and bloody god, then burned everything to ash. the man that had spoke soft words about high ideals was no where, and suddenly it all felt like bile in Louis' mouth.

even after the fire and the loss, running away and hiding himself with glamour, Louis still kept that book.
]

The forest felt like a prison, and I clung to too tightly to the bars.

[ he'd never talked about this before – no, nor had he ever wanted to go back to this place, mentally or physically. it was a representation of everything he hated in this world, as well as everything he lost. it was easier to hate than lose. ]

Perhaps your world will be kinder to them, but they will have hardships nonetheless. Seclusion only feeds the lies, and those beyond the city will still feast, even when their king himself is elda. Yet there is the hard way and the easy way, and the hard way tends to foster strength.

[ Louis tilts his head, allowing Will to stay as close as he likes. that he's not turning him away seems to be his own form of affection and acceptance of the company. ]

The two of us are as elda as any other – raised in this damned place or not – those outside of it see no difference.

[ his voice gets a little quieter. ]

There will be more that come for you.
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xv)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-17 06:54 am (UTC)(link)
[ there it is, bright as Will's eyes, that glorious ferocity. it's freer now, Will answering in an instant without hesitation, like something buried coming to the surface. Louis thinks he is beautiful when he's like this, fearless, balancing on the edge of a blade. he sought this part of Will in open battle, because he didn't know how to bring him again into his company.

Louis presses his fingers against Will's chin, tipping back his head until it's pressed against his chest, and he can look down at him.
]

Will we battle them all?

[ the world does not change quickly, and he's certain that despite Will's approval from the citizens of Euchronia, that the fanatics would certainly find means to take arms against an elda on the throne. the world may have been quelled, but there was still fear and anxiety within it. ]

Though I suppose none could live up to me.

[ it's less a matter of arrogance, and more one of fact. who else becomes so deluded in wanting to kill, that they become a human in the process? ]

That's some what of a comfort.
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xxiv)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-22 04:27 am (UTC)(link)
[ there is an odd sort of comfort, even a bit of gratification, in knowing that no one else has managed to be as good as him at trying to kill Will – in that same thought, no one has been as good as Will at trying to kill him. for now, there's no reason to kill one another, nor a reason to conflict. he was defeated in his quest for the crown, and that's all there was to it. it was, in some ways, inelegant in desperation, but it was required of him to fulfill his own ambitions. ]

Certainly, the king must keep his battle prowess honed.

[ Will says something about Louis, but Louis' mind is somewhere else. ]

You mustn't lose your edge, 'less the fools believe they can sniff out your weakness. I doubt that you have, have you? Or you wouldn't be here, seeking out the one that once challenged you.

[ Louis traces Will's cheek with his thumb. there is a surprising tenderness inside of him when the situation seems to call for it, something of which those close enough to him are aware of. ]

There's a part of you that believes in strength.
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xiii)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-23 12:39 am (UTC)(link)
[ how their positions have switched: not long ago, it was Louis draping him over his desk, asking him to join him. there was always a boldness in Will that came out during their quarrels, or their secret trysts, that Louis found rather beautiful. now it's Will who brought him back, most likely despite some of the protests of his peers, and Will who implores him, as if it's a more of a personal wish than a political drive.

join me, is what he's saying. join me.
]

What would you have of me? A general, who punishes the enemies of the throne who seek to destroy an eldan king? Would you have me as your court archmage, as I had once been, or a personal body guard to stand by your side?

[ Louis isn't sure, himself, where he fits in anymore. Will has a kingdom, he has friends who support him, and certainly has appointed them to their own paths as his royal circle. with his ambitions having failed, and the world moving in a new direction, he doesn't know where he fits in it.

he's had such a difficult time finding a place in the old world, that he sought to make a new one. Will wishes to give him a pace in this new one so badly, but it's difficult to fathom.

regardless, being here with Will is soothing in its own right. it makes certain things seem possible, at least.
]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto liv)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-23 02:51 am (UTC)(link)
[ those are not the words he expected.

Louis is not a man who is ever at a loss for words, but for a moment there is a silence between them, because he's uncertain of what to say. certainly, the king has thought about it – what it means for Euchronia, and what it would mean for the two of them. politically it makes sense, it would solidify his allegiance and quell Louis' fanatics, sell a narrative that they were united in a better world. it would also soften Louis' policies of violence, while still keeping one of tolerance, while Will benefited from Louis' knowledge of the court.

it is ingenious in that bold way where Will leads with his imagination. it's hard to argue.

after gaping for a few seconds, Louis rearranges his expression into something that's less inelegant, and he almost wants to laugh. not because the subject is funny, but he can't help but think that Will has already thought about this.
]

You truly mean this.

[ though it begs the question of what Louis would be doing otherwise. ]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto lxii)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-24 02:47 am (UTC)(link)
[ a little scandal and liveliness is always good for the kingdom, after all. that built-up anxiety needs an outlet, and entertainment certainly offers that. there isn't much more entertaining than a royal wedding.

there may be a point about Will's heir, but the late Hythlodaeus already proved that with a little of the right kind of magic, that a democratic system could be put into place to choose a new ruler. Will was free to decide whether or not he had children, and those children were free to decide whether or not they wanted to pick up the mantel as ruler.

as much as he despised Hythlodaeus, he can admit that he did offer some freedom to his son, and to the country that Louis killed him for.
]

You say that so freely.

[ Louis can dance around it as much as he likes, but there is an underlying understanding that this is also what Will wants. it works well politically, but it's hardly just that, he knows that Will would not do something he truly did not want to, and no one could force him into an unsavory decision against his own principles and desires. they had been fleetingly together when the doors were closed, as if the world could not see what they were doing, ignoring the intimacy when they were at each other's throats. (or so Louis thought, but it wasn't that simple, was it?) he could ask to be sure, but he doesn't need to: there's no doubt in his mind.

Will is also asking for his companionship: most likely in travel, at court, and in a shared bed, now open for the kingdom to mull over their secrets. it's not something made from hard power without thought to the future passed a certain point.

there's a look of quiet contemplation that passes Louis' face, but he does not withdraw his hand. instead he traces Will's bottom lip with his thumb, as if going over the finer details that he does not voice, perhaps the things burrowed somewhere in his heart.
]

Allow me to consider this as I become part of this world once again.

[ it seems, at least, to have grounded him in a way, given him something to think about and linger on his mind as he makes plans as to what he may do next. ]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xvi)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-11-29 02:34 am (UTC)(link)
[ there are ways in which the world has not changed – while the royal sceptre is no longer needed to keep the anxieties of the populace from materializing, the dull opinions and inane exchanges are still rampant – it's disappointing in some ways, comforting in others. there's a mindlessly there that Louis still finds grating, but Will sort of basks in; honestly, Louis doesn't think he'll ever see eye to eye with Will on that, but luckily he doesn't have to. today, he has one purpose, and it's to keep those weak-hearted fools in line.

Louis doesn't get to witness the full plot in motion, but he is there for the tail end of it when his presence is required, and he doesn't interject. it was, in some ways, fascinating to watch them all work, especially Strohl. the plan was formulated, and the group focused on him (all at once, anyone with less confidence would certainly fumble), and Strohl asked him firmly, but evenly if he would fulfill the plot to its ends, Louis replied cooly "if this plan fails, it will not be due to my role in it." it was not a lie, but not the full truth either, if the the plan fell through, he would salvage it and slay the assassins himself, but those were thoughts best left unvoiced. those were desperate measures, and he had told Will he wouldn't kill (well, that was also circumstantial). while he had spent some time with Will's companions, his personal loyalty was to Will, not to them.

that was that, and for now, he had something to look forward to.

there's always something thrilling about being wrapped up in a cloak and walking through the streets of Grand Trad. no one expects him, but that doesn't mean to say that someone won't outright recognize him. he was a very prominent political figure who adored a good scene, so there were plenty that got a good look at him. he was recognizable. still he dons his horns again like a crown, and a tailored, but quaint military garb with a full cape. and as playfully as Alonzo greets him, he's met with the intense, steady of Louis Guiabern, as if it's another part of his attire.

a nidia embracing his own stereotype, interesting.
]

Get in contact with those guards at ready, send word that these traitors should not be killed under any circumstances. While the king will hold his address at the plaza, I will hold rear. I want them brought to me. All of them. I will drag them through the crowd myself.

[ then, there's a cruel smile. ]

Make sure the Igniter Consortium Head is settled before I do.

[ he turns, as if he had just given orders that he expects to be fulfilled, but he pauses mid-step and glances back at Alonzo before drawing up his hood. ]

There are few sins in this world I will not tolerate, and one is treachery.

[ it sounds equal parts a threat as it does a promise.

Louis heads off to put himself in position, cloaking himself as a normal guard before he makes his grand appearance. there are others surrounding the plaza, and it's simple enough to blend in with the lot of them.

if Will wants a show, he will not disappoint him.
]
Edited 2024-11-29 02:35 (UTC)
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xxviii)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-12-04 12:09 am (UTC)(link)
[ Will's speech marks the cadence in Louis' movements. it shouldn't be long now that the snipers will be raising their crossbows, and the casters their wands. Louis waits among the guard strategically placed around the plaza, both there to keep the peace and protect the king. the role is one that's easy to play, at least for now, a hood pulled over a half-helmeted head, dressed in the same uniform as the rest of the soldiers, he blends in flawlessly. no one gives him a second glance; no one asks any questions. instead they glide past him, chattering inanely about Will's address – well, they'll have something more interesting to talk about, soon.

Louis wants to make sure the Igniter Consortium Head is comfortable, as the more comfortable someone is in their power, the more rattled they are when it's challenged.

before they had parted, Louis told Will, "No matter what may target you, or what may happen, do not waver in the delivery of your speech." it was a promise of a show, and a testament of trust. it would send a message to the Igniter Consortium Head before Louis even began his own leg of the show.

the echo of Will's voice is behind him as the squad slinks through the southern plaza, trying to hide among the crowd and take a few key points to gain the upper hand. it's easy when attention is on the king, except to those who know that they're coming. he can hear the last part of Will's speech begin, and he makes his move. to pace it with his voice, Louis counts his steps until he's in front of the first rebel. before the man can act, he disarms him. swearing, the other man trying to center himself enough to strike.

then, Louis speaks.
]

Has it been so long that you've forgotten the mark of your own weakness?

[ it causes him to stop dead, the trickle of sweat creating a thin river from his brow and down his nose. he knows that voice – he knows it, and it doesn't take him long to place it.

"C-count ... Louis?"

it sinks in, then he yells in warning.

"It's Count Louis!"

then, the chaos begins. whatever mission that the ground force thought they could accomplish has been compromised. the reception from the crowd is one of bewilderment until the ground force begins to scramble. some try to hurry their way to the king, unsure if that was a call for retreat, others make for a hasty exit. for them, the capture is swift, as the guards are waiting. now with their positions revealed, Louis can pick off the rest, and he makes short work of them, collecting them like game to a hunter on the prowl. as the rest of the soldiers either calm the masses or drag the cowards away, Louis parades the rest through the crowd and to the podium.

most of them are sniveling all the way there.

"Count Louis please, I know this is what you would have wanted! I know, I know it is!" or "Don't do this, Count Louis, please!" another curses him, and Louis can at least respect that.

as he makes his way forward, he draws his hood back, shaking his hair from the helmet that he tucks beneath his elbow.
]

Quite the crowd you've drawn here today, your majesty. As it so happens, I've brought a few gifts. [ Louis makes an exaggerated gesture to those captured behind him. ] They're all but weak-willed cravens, but I bid that you accept my offering in good grace. I'm certain that whoever sent these traitors to disrupt your address cannot be here, themselves, most likely due to their own cowardice.

[ there are a few from the crowd that can be heard calling his name, the rest in stunned silence. ]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xv)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-12-07 10:40 pm (UTC)(link)
[ it feels good to be on the field again, even if it's for a brief moment of a crowd-pleasing show. part of politics is giving a good performance, and while peace is well and good, the masses need, and crave, entertainment. somewhere, drowned by the sound of Will's voice, he can hear his still-dedicated supporters crying his name. out of the corner of his eye, he can see the Igniter Consortium Head's face rearrange itself quickly from any semblance of surprise.

good, he thinks. now the real game begins.

he's aware of the senate's fear of him, especially after he had made a spectacle of Forden's murder. each and every one of them knew that if they took so much as a step out of place, Louis would find a reason to hunt them down – thus, his presence is as much as a threat now as it was then. the king's acceptance of a verbal allegiance will temper him for now, but he is still as unpredictable and fearless as he was prior to his resurrection.
]

There was once a world that I would have built upon strength, and such still holds to my philosophy: those that had make decrees of attempted regicide in my name are cowards. If I were to kill the king, I would do so myself, and not send mindless lackeys in my stead. All those with my name upon their lips and a sword in their hand without sharing my cause as thus denounced.

[ there's a moment that he looks smug, a curl of a smile on the lips of a snake. as Will suspects: it would be difficult to say that this was not the real Louis Guiabern, matched in performance and cruelty, boldly standing before the king and his guard to say that if there was intention to slay him, that he would do so himself.

though he means it in many ways, if there's going to be anyone that would kill Will, it would be his honor alone, even if he would not make a move to do it. that is his rival, his partner, his king, and anyone who raises a sword will feel his wrath. his words are a promise.

while the Igniter Consortium Head has now composed themselves, there are others on the senate that are not as talented at hiding their own shock.
]

Your majesty, I will protect you from all that take my name with means to slay you, no matter what the cause. While I'm no longer an archmage in service of the crown, you understand that I cannot have my own name sullied.

[ then he does something curious. he takes the last, sweeping steps toward the king and offers his hand. ]

I will see through this world you mean to create.

[ the two of them had clashed on a public stage over and over and over again – in so many cities across Euchronia. they had once fought above Grand Trad, with blades and teeth and bleeding hearts, and after Louis was utterly defeated, it now came to this.

something that should have happened so long ago.
]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto xxxvii)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-12-08 03:08 am (UTC)(link)
[ the king is not the only one surprised, his entirety of his guard is surprised.

of course, Louis wouldn't be satisfied with just annihilating the assassination attempt – after all, Will had told him to put on a show. he put on that show; one that would have all of Grand Trad bustling with rumors, and the council wiping the sweat from their brow.
]

They will think twice before making another move, but they will make another. It's just a matter of time.

[ Louis tells Will as the all head back to the palace. Strohl agrees, and presses that they should be ready to think of their next move. Louis doesn't disagree, and finds that he's – somehow – pulled into this little group, no matter how many barbs Hulkenberg glares at him.

(she will pull her king aside later to warn him, as how easily he seems to get along with them does not seem right to her. of course, it does not seem right to Louis, either. it is a foreign thing for both of them. she'll also ask, delicately, if there's something between the two of them. to her credit, she doesn't pry – the privacy of her king is not something that is hers to invade, after all.)

a week goes by without incident. actually, falling into old habits seems easy. Louis takes to the library, picking through the crown's selection with keen interest. for now, he is watched closely by the crown guards as well as forbidden to use magic. Eupha gives him a relic that disperses the magla around him, making even a talented magician like him unable to use it. Louis hates it, but begrudgingly accepts.

most of his time is spent with either Will, or Fidelio and Basilio. as much as the blood had been boiling, they fall back into easy times. Basilio makes a passing comment to Will how he feels as if he has his old Louis back – the one from just when Will met them, when they were brighter eyed and more hopeful of the world Louis had to offer. there's a few times that Will can even overhear some Louis' laughter as the three of them begin to train together again.

Strohl and Heismay are the other two that begin to bridge the gap. at first Strohl doesn't want to admit it, but Louis does give decent advice, and when he disregards some of the man's cruelty, it's sound enough for him to use.

there are dinners and drinking, and one jaunt on the gauntlet runner. Louis begins to notice it too – it's a bit like he was there all along. when he's in the midst of it – when he doesn't think about it – he's fine. when his thoughts interrupt the book he's reading to tell him how he doesn't belong, he finds that he cannot chase them away. they were all too accepting of him, too ready to welcome him despite the human monstrosity that he had become. some days he feels much like a prisoner, stripped of magic and left in a cage of rather lovely bars.

so, he leaves. he's neither to clever about it, nor careful in hiding his foodsteps if someone knew where to look. when Will resurrected him he had left the Eldan Sanctum without a thought, but he realizes he should have lingered. when he had left, he had never looked back, not even visited that place he called home that was burned to ash.

it's two weeks later that two of Will's personal guards interrupt his breakfast with Gallica.

"Your Majesty, my apologies for the interruption. It's Coun –" she stops herself. "Lord Louis, my king. He's gone. There are no traces of how he left, he's simply gone."

"What do you mean he just vanished?" Gallica asks.

"We searched the entire perimeter. We thought he may have gone into the city, but there have been no reports of his movements within these walls."

"We need to go find him before he does something he'll regret."
]
luciferi: by sousaphone dnt (canto i)

[personal profile] luciferi 2024-12-09 11:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[ once upon a time, back when Louis had not taken the name Guiabern, he had been Louis Charadrius. his mother and father were medics, and they knew the ways of physical and mental illnesses, using both magic to medicine to tend to their community. they were both soft, caring people, and from what Louis could remember of them, they cherished him dearly. back then he weas a thin, gangly creature with a mop of blond hair and eyes that got wide at the tales beyond his dreamy little village. the elda had hidden themselves there for generations, hording in their forest with their fairies and their own culture secret from that of the rest of Euchronia.

then a man came to Louis' village, with horns like a crown, and stories of everything that was beyond. Louis had followed him around so incessantly, asking so many questions that the village started to take note, and gossip about the boy who became the man's shadow.

"There goes that Charadrius child again, right on his heels." "Do you think that someone should stop him? It could be dangerous ..." "Let him be, it's rare for anyone to visit, these days, he must be excited." "Have you seen his parents? Perhaps I should fetch them."

those were the days of the eldan queen and all those under her protection. peaceful, quiet, dull days of hidden histories and forgotten magic. even then Louis had been adept to it, learning from his parents, learning from the stranger that came to them, and reading book after book after book. one day, before his departure, the horned stranger handed him a book with a gilded cover, adorn with a golden heart.

"I hope the two of us can share the same world one day."

they did, but the circumstances that befell both of them were not kind. when watched his parents, friends and people he had known all his life as shadows dancing in the flames, he made a promise to himself: never again. that day he had hidden the book beneath his tunic, as if it were something more precious than his life, and the pages alone could protect him from the world's cruelties. when he was taken that day to the capital, he had not looked back. to steel himself against the world's demands, he would not give it the satisfaction of his tears.

from then on, he had not look back, swallowed his pain until it became nothing but a black heart in his chest, and the decay broke him from inside outward. the promise that he had made himself became an exception, and he reasoned that the whole world could bask in flames until he remade it. when he was condemned for the prince's curse and Hythlodaeus did not speak for him, he knew the dream was dead. there was no world they both could share – no, he would have to make a new world.

this was not a place that Louis wanted to be, but he found himself here, anyway. he is restless, he has been since Will had resurrected him. perhaps he wanted to be found – wanted to be followed.

he doesn't turn to greet him.
]

I lived here. [ his voice sounds casual, but distant, as if he found a memory of his that lived in the motes beneath the streams of sunlight. ] There were stone walls, and the door would open from dawn 'til dusk. The villagers here would implore the aid of my parents for their various maladies, from poison plants to deep, clutching magla that had corrupted their hearts. I learned quite a bit from them.

[ because as much as he left it all behind, as much as he did not think about it, as much as he ran from it and reasoned with it and pushed it away, it was still there, following him like a ghost. it was in the flowers in his room, the copy of the book he still kept like a precious bird, and the name of his skyrunner: Charadrius. ]

...

Yes, it is beautiful.

[ maybe these ruins would eventually be swallowed by the earth, eroded by time, lost to history, the flowers with their petals open to the heaven like a memorial. ]

Do you remember it as it had been before the flames?

[ Louis is charming, easy to talk to, but he could be difficult when he wanted to be. to what extent he hadn't known, due to his own status; some learned habits of his own making left the other side of the conversations absolutely speechless. he learned from court how to hide his weaknesses, shock his opponents, and show nothing but strength. it became more than just his opponents, soon it just became everyone.

but it was not Will now.
]

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